my own doctor

Dr. Samuel Olfindo and Ciara's conversation, from In Your Eyes movie (2010)

FIRST PART

What if you want something but to get what you want, you'll hurt someone. Do you follow your heart's desire or you'll sacrifice so you could do what you think is right? 

For me, I'll always go for what is right. 

Though you know that you will never be happy? 

Doing what is right always make me feel happy.

One day when you fall in love, you will know that in loving, there's no hard and fast rules, and at the end of the day, what's important is what will make you happy. 

SECOND PART

I know it’s painful, if you think you can escape what you feel, you’re wrong. At the end of the day, it’s what makes you happy that really matters.

I can never be happy hurting someone.

You already did hurt someone.

She doesn’t know yet so I can still straighten up the mistakes, right?

If that makes you happy. It’s your choice.

THIRD PART

I guess you’re right. People’s happiness differs with each other. What makes you happy is to do the right thing.

I've got a simple life before, boring but not complicated. Now I know how it feels like to be happy. I know now how hard it is to be sad. Sometimes I wish that I’ve never would have met him.

Meeting him was probably the best thing that ever happened to you. You chose to let him go. Be strong, it’s possible that the pain won’t go.

I hope I’ll get used to it.

Nobody gets used to pain. You just learn to live with it. In time you’ll cope.

These lines are relevant to what I've experienced or I must say what I am experiencing. The first part defines who I am when I was still living a simple, boring life. Second part, was when I learned the truth. The third part, was when I made a decision. In the process I have my own Dr. Samuel Olfindo, my father, whom I can't hide the tears. Though I know it hurts him more than I do. Every time I feel like a cry baby , just a thought of what he always say "magpakatatag ka, lagi ka lang magdasal" makes me feel better somehow. At this age, I can still say that I'm a daddy's girl who always needs a cuddle to ease my pain.